That IV you say, no way to keep it?
I will make sure that you do I commit.
That Doc ordered it, it has to stay
I feel unfortunately that your opinion will not sway.
So I wrap and wrap and wrap away,
That Kerlex will unlikely hold you at bay.
Please, oh please don’t wet the bed
It’s such a pain, one all nurses dread
Use the bedpan or a urinal
Simply peeing the bed is just criminal
OOhhhh darn C Diff you’ve infected another!
I am only so glad it wasn’t my mother.
Stay away! Be gone! As the sun before rain.
In all of our bowels you’re such a huge pain
Discharge is not ready,
Yes I know the Doc said you are free already!
However, I have paperwork to do for you
So please hold up and I will soon be through
Oh fine patient what a pleasure it was
To wrap your IV with three rolls of gauze.
Don’t pull it or touch it or even looks its way
That IV you have needs to stay!
Security please come this patients gone crazy
I swear its not me being angry or lazy.
They’re kicking and throwing and all out of sorts
The way they are looking, I might mess my shorts.
Holy cow you need to wait,
I don’t have time for you to micturate.
So cross your legs or jump up and down,
Just please wait a second I’ll be around
How I would like to punch thee
Your beep and you boop,
It happens again and again in a loop
Today I think I’ll give you my boot
Strokes are no jokes, not even funny
They can crush a spirit or cost lots of money,
So please dear sir, take your aspirin
It will go better for you and keep you long lastin’
When you enter C Diff Isolation
Be sure to wear gown and gloves, it’s not a vacation.
Spreading C Diff causes diarrhea
For this, hand washing is the best idea.